Daniel Ausbun
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Can a Divorced Man Serve as Deacon?

5/9/2013

16 Comments

 
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1 Timothy 3:12 states, "Deacons must be husbands of one wife." Does this one verse disqualify a man to serve as deacon in his church?

Here's what the Southern Baptist Convention says on the issue:
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3. Can a divorced person serve as a pastor (or deacon) in an SBC church?
4. Can a divorced pastor conduct baptisms or serve the Lord's Supper in an SBC church? Once again, because of the autonomous nature of SBC churches, there is no policy within the Convention that addresses these matters. Each church directs its own affairs apart from outside intervention, deciding for itself how to deal with such matters.

Some Southern Baptist churches have called pastors or elected deacons who had been divorced, but there is no way of knowing how many have done so. There are Southern Baptist churches that would not base their decision on the issue of divorce. Others would want to know if the divorce fell within the parameters of what some refer to as a "biblically allowed" divorce. Still other Southern Baptist churches view 1 Timothy 3:2 as barring any divorced man from pastoral or deacon ministry. Again, there is no way for us to know the actual numbers, but there likely is a significant number of churches representing each view. Most churches probably fall into either of the last two categories.

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The last two categories are the "exception clauses to divorce" and "no divorced deacons." You can read my article regarding the biblical exceptions to divorce and remarriage.

Other considerations on this issue is if a man is saved after his divorce. Colossians 2:13 states upon salvation, we're made alive with Christ and forgiven of our past.

Another view is how a man has lived decades after his divorce. If someone had a quick marriage and divorce at a young age, and now has been faithfully married for 30+ years - this is a different scenario than someone experiencing divorce last year. This view is promoted in a well-written article from Southern Baptist leader Joe McKeever. You can read it here.

What do I believe? Mark 10:9 states not to get divorced, but Matthew 5:32 offers the exception of "sexual immorality." If a man's divorce falls within one of the two biblical exceptions, he should not be disqualified to serve as a deacon. Remember, though, if the divorced man gets remarried, he becomes disqualified (Luke 16:18). Only death releases someone from marriage (Romans 7:2-3; 1 Corinthians 7:39). Scripture does not allow remarriage after divorce (Deuteronomy 24:1-4; Matthew 19:9). Divorce isn't what disqualifies most deacons, it's remarriage.


Here's a summary of the four major views of whether a divorced man is allowed to serve as deacon:

1). Not allowed - divorce disqualifies.
2). Allowed if divorce occurred before conversion to Christ.
3). Allowed if man has been faithfully married many years to current wife.
4). Allowed if divorce fell within biblical exceptions - and not remarried. (What I believe)

16 Comments
Brother George,
1/15/2015 09:45:56 am

Since we already have divorced deacons serving active terms, I don't think that they should be re-asked when their term runs out. Continuing this practice isn't what the Bible, (God's Word) tells us. One has nothing to do with the other. There is no refer to Matthew after 1 Timothy 3:12. Either you take the requirements as the Word of God (the Bible) or you don't. I also don't recall there being limiting terms in the Bible either. If you can't find a qualified man, you don't fill the spot just for the sake of numbers. Why should a church constitution over-ride God,s Word. What's the next step; ordaining women? They would probably serve better than some of our Deacons do now. Oh, that's not in God's Word either. Bad choices may have to follow us the rest of our lives. Look what happened when Abraham and Sarah couldn't way for God. We are still suffering from that one. Don't forget Adam.
I was inspired by Adrian Rogers video not to compromise on God's word. I have always felt the same way, but have been over-ridden at last years deacons meeting. All I heard from everybody was I think, I feel or I believe, yet no wanted to hear what God said. At that meeting, we also said that the candidate would be examined first before a vote was brought before the Church. That didn't happen. Do these new candidates know what is expected of them, (page 12 of the Church By-Laws)? Examining them just before the ordination may reveille something you don't want to hear. I feel uncomfortable when we know what God wants and we tell him, he's behind the times and get Himself up to speed. I will not compromise on God's behalf any more. Instead of making the Bible fit into this world, we need to make this world fit into the Bible. Do you think God is happy with us?
Brother George

Reply
Mandy
12/11/2017 08:25:39 am

You can divorce but Jesus calls both the female and male in first Marriage Covanant to remain single. Death is the only way that release of Covanant is broken. Remarried couples are no different than a homosexual couple marrying in the church. The marriage is null & void in Gods Kingdom. The State & Gov can recognize it as a marriage but a piece of paper stating an official divorce or marriage is legal is not of Gods kingdom. The Bible makes it clear.Yes adultery is permissible but need to remain single if that's what you choose. We just want to find a selfish way out. Otherwise is an unlawful marriage & both parties are committing adultery. This is why the Church is mocked. There is no grey middle ground. Homosexuals then should be allowed to marry in the church. The Church needs to take a stand & not try to make people feel good.

Reply
Michael Paul
1/14/2018 12:35:51 pm

We have a man the church is grooming for deacon but I feel it is wrong because this man is on his third marriage? I have heard it said if he would get in front of the church and explain his divorces , give timeline and details then maybe he would qualify but I just don't think dirty laundry should be aired in the church. I myself feel he should be disqualified.

Reply
Jessica Smith
11/28/2018 03:22:44 pm

We have a man in our church that has been married several times, and has recently been caught cheating wwit his new wife and is a deacon in the church. Many families have left the church but he is kept on because he brings in money. This isn't right but the congregation had no say so in the matter.

Reply
Gugu Mdlalose
2/4/2018 04:36:02 pm

I just want to know why am I not allowed to serve as a church leader cause I didn't ask my husband to divorce me he just loved someone else more than me and divorced me.I am still in the Church where he left me but am not allowed to lead.Is the Church allowed to judge????

Reply
Gene Frantz
6/17/2018 10:55:40 pm

I believe there is another applicable passage in Corinthians, which could have input, in some cases. It basically states that if the unbeliever in a marriage leaves, the Christian is "not bound". I believe this means he would both be free to marry again and/or be a deacon, in that particular circumstance.

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Rob Yancey
6/26/2018 09:59:47 am

I am a Deacon and am faced with a pastor and his wife who are contemplating divorce.Since I am knew at being a deacon.Besides not making judgement and supporting my pastor.We the situation becomes common knowledge how do I minister to the families in my care.Also as a leader how should I stand.

Reply
Jackie Ward
9/19/2018 08:38:36 pm

In the associated scriptures, was man allowed more than one wife at the same time during the time of the scriptures? I believe in the Bible but it seems there are too many interpretations. So if we go by scriptures, only those that have not been in God's laws nor mans laws are in the position of holding church posts. That means no killers, thieves, addicts, drunkards as well as anyone that has divorced for any reason other than adultry is ineligible. That will leave a lot of positions open, even pulpits. I guess a terrible marriage or an abusive marriage is okay and allows one to hold a church position.

Reply
M L Owens
11/10/2018 01:05:22 pm

I am a little confused about this scripture. I study the Bible and see a society where many men had multiple wives and other female companions. Do you not think Paul could be referencing that?
We read that when we ask forgiveness, everything is erased from our past. Does this mean that a bad marriage resulting in divorce is an exception and that if we fall into that category we are unforgiven, our sin (or sin of a past spouse) is unforgiven and we are not “new”? Can we not serve the Lord in the official role of servant (which is really what a deacon is designed to do? Seems like a lot of tradition and interpretation by man has tainted this process and the intent of Paul’s words. Many men have been led to believe they are unworthy to serve. My friends, that I believe is not of the Christ that I know and serve.

Reply
A Curry
8/20/2020 10:11:24 am

I agree, this is how I have always read this scripture and believe that is the intent as well. In a time when men had many wives, I believe that the call to be the "husband of one wife" simply meant that with his focus on only one wife (not many) he would have more time to focus on the work of the church. I also believe that any divorce that occurred before a person is saved should not disqualify them from holding the office of a deacon or pastor. The Bible tells me that all my sins were forgiven....ALL of them, not all of them but that pesky divorce. I believe that man has chosen to focus on this one thing in determining those who qualify and using it as a way to hold back those God is calling to serve. If God is calling someone to a position, who is man to tell him otherwise? Honestly, they need to focus more on the other parts like being an example before the church, their children and those out in the world and stop making folks feel unworthy to do the job God is calling them to do.

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Judy A. Williams
11/28/2018 02:19:44 pm

Should a Deacon in a church live as husband and wife and not being legally married to the lady.He is 65yrs. old and she is 30 yrs.old ;
and never married with three childrens
.Both are members of the same church.The wife has left the church after the divorce.

Reply
Wesley Roberts
5/3/2021 09:07:19 am

1 Corinthians 7:15 states that under the Biblically allowed divorce the innocent spouse is no longer held under bondage. Therefore freeing then from the marriage bond. This would mean they could be remarried without it being adultery or a sin.

15 Yet if the unbelieving one is leaving, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us in peace.

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John Linebarger
9/23/2021 09:50:23 pm

Just glad that I serve a God that forgives me of my sins daily. I find it increasingly troublesome that a church cannot forgive what God can. Just my 2 cents.

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Lenny arnold
1/20/2022 05:04:39 pm

Nowhere in scripture does it mention divorce as disqualification for a deacon, the SBC has no guidelines for this and left it up to the churches. Man has decided to use their own judgement and not the word of God.” The husband of one wife”, Greek definition is “one woman man”. From salvation forward, how many sins where forgiven? ALL according to scripture

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Ronald Banks
5/15/2022 03:25:13 pm

Paul was a persecuter of Christians. He was responsible for the deaths of many Christians in the early church. Most of the books of the New Testament were written by him. These books (Letters) were written to the Churches that he established while on his Missionary Journeys. So I find it difficult to believe that God could use Paul after the things he had done but has no use for someone who has been divorced to serve as a Deacon in the Church.

Reply
Seberina Shoemaker
1/12/2023 08:01:07 pm

When Saul was blinded on the road to Damascus he was still a sinner who persecuted Christians, yet after God restored his sight and he became a Christian, he was a new creation,renamed "Paul " no more a sinner.

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